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LOCAL NEWS

Man in pants on the way

LUEDENSCHEID - Yesterday moring at 8 a.m., the 25 years old Nicole N. appeared at the local police station. She was dressed in white and strangely held a bouquet in her hands. She reported someone missing. The 31 years old Ralf K. is searched for in pants.

As Nicole N. indicated, the person looked for had to be departed from his flat, Germanen-strasse 92, with unknown destination in an accumulation of having a depression.

Disappeared: Ralf K.

A crime can be excluded. All valuables, a birth certificate which lay open in the flat, an identity card and a carefully ironed suit were found during an inspection of the flat. Two golden rings lay untouched on the night console.
 





Mysterious disappearing of cucumbers

Luedenscheid. The inhabitans of Lüdenscheid have asked themselves for several weeks now who would be responsible for the fact that not any cucumber could be find in the whole city. Yesterday, the secret was solved. Cucumber agents were daily on the way to buy the whole stores. However, the vegetable was not used as food but for the daily face masks of the bride. Who saw Nicole in the church today, knows that it was worth itself.

 

A so-called bachelor leaving party with Thomas N., Michael W. and Olaf L. had preceded this incident, at which the youth should have said goodbye to the companions of his carefree bachelor's life with a lot of tears and alcohol.

First examinations of the witness turned out that the wedding candidate said goodbye to his carousal comrades at 4 a.m. Witness Thomas N.: "We accompanied the missing person into his flat and lay him on his bed."

However, the three witnesses involved into contradictions during the description of the act course of events. Among other things it remains unclarified who carried now whom the stairs up. As and when the three witnesses left the flat of the missing person remains unclarified, too. Witness Michael W.: "I had a mental blackout."

Nicole N. expressly refers to the fact that the missing person is not there. The other people involved into the carouse of the night have arrived completely to the pending national sanctioned ceremony.

The examining officials noticed, however, that all people of male sex were from remarkably pale face colour, some of them had dark rings under the eyes and were characterised of a mumbled way of speaking.

The bride father Wolfgang N. exposed a high reward for indications of the whereabout of the missing person. All wedding guests accept useful indications.
 
 
 

Wedding request was discovered!
Exclusivly with us!

Luedenscheid. After several weeks of investigations we have finally found the letter, in which our dear Ralf asked for Nicole's hand in marriage. We publish exclusively the exact wording:

"Dear Nicole! You are the most enormous what has ever thrown on the wedding market! I offer 45 % of my profits as marriage companion, 100 % of my heart and the rest of my life. If my supply corresponds to your demand, we should fuse fast."

Please congratulate them and sign

Nicole's and Ralf's Wedding-Guestbook.

They would be verry happy about this!
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